Wednesday 28 May 2008

Sadness

The past few weeks had been very difficult. It is still difficult. The pain is still raw. There were mixed emotions: shock, angry and sad. At times how I wish I could just curl-up and cry myself out or I would sleep and sleep until I wake up and find everything is just one hell of a nightmare.

There is no regret and I will never ask Allah why. I know He Knows best and the Most Merciful. It was heartbreaking to see the man who brought me into the world, lying helpless and was in most unimaginable pain. When the doctor told me his condition, I prayed so hard that if there was any good deed that I had done which had been accepted, please God exchange it with mercy to my father. Please take away the pain. Merciful Allah, I seek solace in the thought that he didn't suffer long.

My only regret is that I didn't get to give him a better life. Seeing him looking strong, healthy and always jolly made me took things for granted. Never once I thought he would leave us now. But as much as we love him, Allah loves him more.

To everyone reading this, I Thank You. It is not my intention to share this sadness in my life. I only ask you to learn from my mistake. For those of you who are still blessed with a mother and/or a father, please shower them with your love. Make them happy. Ask for their health. Help their problems. Give them presents. For there is no other person in this world that we owe more than our parents. We owe them our lives.

Salaam.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

Please correct me if I am wrong, my dear Mrs R.E., we owe our lives to the ONE and ONLY God the Almighty. Of course, we owe our life time as children to our beloved parents - period.

I can relate to you on your sorrow of losing a loved one. My late father passed away in 2003 aged 74. But your dearly departed was 63 years old i.e. same age as our beloved Prophet Muhammad Sallallahu Alaihi Wassalam (Peace be upon him), so if it is any consolation, at least you should be proud of that fact that Allah Subhannahu Wataala took him away from you and your family at that rightful age for a man to have lived life to the fullest.

The day before my late father had a stroke, I had pledged to make him proud, too. And I am working hard at it to keep my promise to my late father, in fact struggling!

All the same, fate and destiny is for the Lord Almighty to make it happen so have patience and full faith in Him, my dear Mrs R.E. For all you know, the peaceful soul of your late father is looking down at his loving daughter from his special place in Paradise...AMIN!

naz said...

Condolences to you and your family.